Middle children of the family are often overshadowed by their older siblings. You don’t let them experience anything for themselves like the gifted eldest, and you don’t let them dominate the spotlight like the attention-seeking lastborn.
The characteristic of middle children is their feeling of exclusion and misunderstanding. Discover the features of middle child syndrome in this article and what to do when you have an outgoing, defiant, pleaser, and peacemaker.
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What is the Middle Child Syndrome?
The order of birth can affect personality type somewhat. In general, older children are more responsible and reliable. Having first-time parents who apply extremely rigorous rules and give them undivided attention may explain their Type A personalities and strict perfectionist tendencies.
Lastborns, however, tend to be fun-loving and uncomplicated because parents are relaxed with the youngest siblings. The youngest often acts selfish, arrogant, and attention-seeking since many older siblings look up to them.
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Factors contributing to middle child syndrome.
It’s not uncommon for parents and grandparents to make a big deal about all the firsts of a firstborn, such as when they walk, get a tooth, learn how to tie their laces, or do their first cross country run. The next set of siblings will already be familiar with all these things after a couple of years.
Being the middle child might not be the best situation because the child may not feel like they fit in with the other children. Although most parents attempt to treat their offspring the same way, parents are not the only factors contributing to a child’s development.
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In the company of their siblings, children spend approximately 33% of their free time, so they contribute significant amounts toward developing their self-esteem, ambition, and personality.
Parents and even other family members often feel as if middle children are ignored since they must fight for attention. Parents are often unaware that they are enhancing the feeling of their children.
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In some circumstances, parents may believe the older child needs more help with homework, given that they are older and the work is more complicated, while the younger child still appears to be a baby (no matter how old they are), thus needing extra help. This scenario leads to the middle child feeling invisible and unwanted since they are largely ignored.
Here are some tips for dealing with middle child syndrome.
Cliff Isaacson and Kris Radish argue in The Birth Order Effect that middleborns need to be accepted precisely for who they are to counteract the attention they receive from their overachieving firstborns and their spotlight-hogging lastborns. You can handle middle child syndrome with these tips.
Offer reassurance. It is essential to remind your child that they weren’t punished because of their siblings and that their actions didn’t change that you still care about them. A middle-born child who feels lost and confused needs to know why the punishment is taking place.
Don’t leave them out. Make sure your middle child receives enough attention to avoid them acting out. If you lavish praise on their incredible easel paintings, you can help your middle child succeed at the Even though asel painting.